I think I died a long time ago.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize