would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
