'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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