addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
