What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
