Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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