Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
