KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize