omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
