the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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