hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
how can u be prego again
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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