I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize