there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
This is my gift to your gina
We had sex on a dog bed..
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
