he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Do vagina's smell?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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