The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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