whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
