It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
