he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
