I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
