i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
