You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
