eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Randomize
