The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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