what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
