he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
