the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
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