Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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