Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
