To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
