your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
