How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
OPIZZABONMYDICK
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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