Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
