Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
tell your sister to shave her snatch
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Randomize
