Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
