So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
