I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize