I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
