All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I made him laugh his dick is mine
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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