I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
