I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
