He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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