My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
