Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
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