help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
