Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
