I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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