The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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