im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
