I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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