everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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