ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
