And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Drake has all the answers
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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