let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
